Rodney Dangerfield and Chris Farley had life figured out when they took the lax route to graduation. Although Dangerfield had already lived life by the time that he, Thornton Mellon (Back to School) went back to college to earn his degree, he and Chris Farley, Tom Callahan Jr. (Tommy Boy) realized that the real world is hard and that life is easier when it is confined to fraternities and house parties (at least in the movies).
The point I am trying to make? I wish my life were as cool as a movie, where I could be Ferris Bueller whenever I felt it necessary, but free like Macaulay Culkin and never have to worry about money (Richie Rich). Sadly, the odds of my life turning out like a Hollywood film are slim to none. Heck, I can’t even follow the one rule about fight club. I don’t understand why the simplicity of a fictitious plot cannot be applied to my overwhelming college life. If only I could be more like Ryan Reynolds in National Lampoon’s Van Wilder, where I would rule the school and never have to worry about mundane things such as “growing up” and “getting a real job”, however; my name isn’t Peter Pan. I haven’t found the fountain of youth and I have to start getting used to waking up at the indecent hour of 7:30 a.m. I am gradually stepping closer to the steep edge of adulthood and responsibility. I feel like my time in college has adequately prepared me to become the next President of Tim McGraw’s fan club. Even if I don’t turn out to be a “winner”, no matter what curveball life may throw at me, may it be wrinkles, osteoporosis, sleep apnea, or dentures; I will always feel as if my story could have been told better if it would have been a movie first.
Happy summer!
Sincerely,
Cassie Paulsen
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